My Facebook feed has been full of things that are making me cry this week (and so not in a good way), so can we just talk about random stuff this morning and maybe eat cake for lunch?
1. One thing that did make me happy this week: coming across this bowling ball in the street while out on a walk yesterday morning.
It’s obviously a gutter ball.
I’m going to admit that I about killed myself laughing over that yesterday, and I was kind of upset nobody was around to enjoy my joke.
But then I remembered I could tell everyone on the Internet about it.
Add that to my list of reasons to have a blog: to have a place to share your corny dad jokes when you’re not actually a dad so you don’t have any kids to share them with.
2. Speaking of dad things, Ancestry.com is having a 10% sale right now on their DNA kits. I just ordered mine. (For myself, not for my dad — sorry, Dad). And I’m SO EXCITED.
I’m really hoping that it tells me I’m descended from Egyptian pharaohs and Mongolian horse warriors. But I suspect it’s more likely I come from a long-line of sturdy, German potato farmers.
Either way, EXCITING!
Have any of you done this? What did you find out? Any surprises?
3. Last week one of the comments on my Random Stuff List asked me if I had any suggestions for books on strong, independent, single women. And, well, I’m a bit embarrassed to say I could only think of two and they’re both a bit obvious: Wild and Eat, Pray, Love.
The truth is that I usually read popular fiction because I like stories and I like to know what everyone’s talking about, okay? And, well, in case you haven’t noticed, the lady characters from popular fiction tend to be more crazy-town than inspirational. (Think Gone Girl and The Girl on the Train. These are not exactly the kind of ladies anyone should aspire to be. Unless you’re aspiring to go to jail.)
So I threw the question out on my Facebook page, and you all had some awesome suggestions. Three that I’m definitely downloading: Tracks: A Woman’s Solo Trek Across 1700 Miles of Australian Outback, What I Was Doing While You Were Breeding: A Memoir (I mean, how could I not with a title like that?) and Girl Waits with Gun (Also, AWESOME title.)
Do you have any other suggestions for books about bad ass, single ladies conquering the world?
4. Speaking of reading, here’s a fun quiz that helps you figure out what you should be reading this summer.
It’s kind of like one of those Facebook quizzes. But it won’t tell you that your spirit animal is Beyonce. (Which, honestly, do you need another Facebook quiz telling you that? Because, seriously, by now, you should just KNOW that.)
5. Yesterday I wore a sleeveless dress to a party WITHOUT a cardigan over it, which I haven’t done in approximately EVER.
And then I went out for ice cream, which I ate on a bench on the sidewalk while watching people walk by.
I suspect all of that has something to do with my reading this article earlier in the week: Stop Hiding: This is What Summer is All About.
5. Speaking of getting over body hang-ups, this trailer for Embrace, a documentary about body image literally had me crying at my kitchen table this week. I so hope this hits the cinemas here in the States or at least the Netflix.
6. Serious question: should I get a spiralizer? You know that thing that makes “pasta” out of vegetables.
I never thought I’d ask that question because I am so not that person.
I like healthy food and all. But I am completely opposed to the practice of substituting not-so-healthy food with healthy food and then pretending like they are the same thing.
For example, you will never see me pretending “nut-cheese” is, in fact, cheese. I also can’t get behind the whole cauliflower pizza crust craze. And that thing where people pretend that frozen bananas are ice cream? STOP THAT NONSENSE RIGHT NOW.
Do you have a spiralizer? Do you use it?
7. Apparently bears can open up car doors.
Cue me NEVER CAMPING AGAIN.
8. You guys, there’s a woman in Denver who wants to open a cat bar.
Cue me MOVING TO DENVER RIGHT NOW.
(Wait. Do they have bears in Denver? Because I need to know before I start packing my bags.)
9. Speaking of cats, have you seen these newborn kitten photos? I’m pretty much DYING.
10. Also this woman complained to her Internet company, using photos of her cat. Because GENIUS.
That’s all, friends. Please feel free to share your DNA surprise stories, single lady book suggestions and spiralizer recipes below!
Disclosure: Some of the above links are affiliate links, which means I can earn a small commission for any purchases made at no extra cost to you. Which means more ice cream for me! Yay!