Merry Christmas to everyone who celebrates! And happy Thursday to all! In honor of the holiday (and Thursday), I made you this list!
I’m sure it’s just what you wanted, right?
1. On Monday, I drove from Michigan to Buffalo, so I could celebrate the holidays with family. Prior to my trip, my inner prepper stocked up the back seat of my car with everything I might need in case I happened to get stuck in a billion feet of snow: a shovel, a sleeping bag, extra hats and gloves, and twenty pounds of granola bars. But I arrived to spring-like weather, and the only snow I’ve seen are the sad little bits left over from last month’s billions of feet of snow.
So I guess I’ll just be using that shovel to shovel piles of Wegmans sushi into my mouth. I’m totally okay with this.
Also, why isn’t Wegmans EVERYWHERE, by now? Really.
2. In addition to eating ALL THE WEGMANS SUSHI, I also want to watch ALL THE HOLIDAY MOVIES.
I’m particularly excited about the new Annie movie. My great aunt Maggie took me to see the original Annie when I was eight years old. It was the first movie I ever saw in a cinema, and I remember thinking that a) my parents had really been holding out on me and b) a movie theater is the most amazing place on Earth.
I still feel pretty much the same way. (About movie theaters. And, okay, a little bit about my parents.)
Also, Into the Woods, you guys! I’m totally against people talking during movies, but singing along is okay, right? Because I’m going to have to sing along. I really won’t have much of a choice.
3. Speaking of movies, I went to see Wild in the cinema before I left Michigan.
And now I’m convinced I need to go on a super long hike all by myself. Except a super a long hike that would not include my encountering any snakes, bears or creepy forest-dwelling ax murderers.
Anyone know a hiking trail that matches that description? Bonus points if that trail happens to go past some diners where I can pick up some decent brunch. I mean, just because I’m hiking doesn’t mean I have to do without waffles, does it?
4. When I was in Detroit the other weekend, my phone decided it was no longer interested in multi-tasking. Or any tasking really.
The camera completely stopped working, which meant I couldn’t Instagram any of my meals. DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THAT KILLED ME?
Also, the GPS would conk out right about the time I turned down a dark street in the middle of nowhere. Which was really fun to experience in a city like Detroit, let me tell you.
And, in order to make a phone call, I’d have to dial the number and then wait for five minutes before the phone would finally connect me.
So for Christmas, I bought myself a brand, new, shiny phone. Yay!
I never really got into apps before because my old phone was so slow and buggy, but now that I have a phone that actually works, I want to download ALL THE APPS. That way I will never have to make eye contact with anyone ever again!
So, tell me, smart-phone-addict-friends, what apps should I be downloading and getting totally addicted to right now?
5. Speaking of my trip to Detroit the other weekend, I didn’t tell you that I also stopped in Dearborn for a night.
First, I ate ALL THE ARABIC FOOD.
And then I went to Holiday Nights at Greenfield Village, an old-timey village at the Henry Ford Museum, where I got to ride in a Model T.
And then I walked around the town eating old-timey food and drinking old-timey beer.
So, basically, it was the best thing ever.
6. Speaking of old-timey stuff, I love this Twitter feed of real-live requests kids made to Santa back in the olden days.
Mostly because there’s stuff like this:
“Dear Santa, Please bring me a bicycle, books, fiddle, and a meat saw. -William NC1912”
You gotta love a kid who knows what he wants — and what he wants happens to be a meat saw.
7. So I know none of you would ever make the mistake of putting an apostrophe in your family name on your holiday cards, but in case you know someone who did, you might want to forward them this link.
8. Fun fact: Christmas in Japan is the best.
They have all the cheesy, Christmassy stuff, like lights and Hello Kitty dressed up like Santa Claus, but none of the obligations, like actually being expected to buy presents for people.
Another fun fact about Christmas in Japan: it’s considered “tradition” to eat Kentucky Fried chicken on that day.
9. Speaking of Hello Kitty, I’m going to need a ticket for this Hello Kitty plane. So, ummm, if you haven’t gotten me a Christmas present yet….
10. And, finally, let’s talk about the feeling that you get when you recognize yourself as the “local woman” in an article by The Onion.
Because that’s exactly how I felt when I read this article about the vacationing woman who thinks her cats miss her.
Now, excuse me, while I DRIVE HOME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE HOW CAN I POSSIBLY ENJOY MYSELF THIS CHRISTMAS KNOWING THAT MY CAT THINKS I’VE PROBABLY ABANDONED HER??? GAH!
How are you doing this week? Did Santa get you what you wanted?