Sure, I was skeptical that I would find love just because I was taking photos of beer and baby ducks and all the other random things that make me happy on a daily basis.
But, hey, this had to be better than my usual attempt at finding love. (Namely: binge watching episodes of Scandal while eating iced animal crackers and drinking white wine. Just so you know, this is a really crappy way to meet potential love interests. But it’s a great way to spend a Friday night. Or EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT EVER.)
Well, you guys, I’m happy to report that it’s true. Taking photos of your alcoholic beverage of choice and posting them on Instagram will, indeed, help you find love.
Or, at least, it worked for me!
Yep, that’s right.
I’m completely and one hundred percent head over heels, you guys, and I’m only on Day 32!
And, well, not to brag or anything, but the feeling is totally mutual.Yep, that’s right, I now have a cat.
Or a cat has me.
I can’t really decide which expression is most appropriate.
Because, to be honest, I didn’t really decide to have this cat.
She just kind of happened to me.
I’d actually been thinking about getting a cat for a while, but I couldn’t make up my mind about whether or not I was ready for the whole commitment thing. And, the whole hair-all-over-my-black-pants thing.
I’ve even been having dreams about getting a cat. Like actual, literal dreams.
A couple weeks ago, I had a dream I was on a yacht with George Clooney, and he gave me a kitten, and I was seriously more excited about the kitten than I was about the yacht or George Clooney.
And then last week I had a dream I was in a bar, and I left my purse on a chair for a moment, and then when I came back, it was full of kittens and I was like, “HOLY COW, THIS IS THE BEST BAR EVER. CAN I GET SOME CHAMPAGNE OVER HERE, BARTENDER? I HAVE A PURSEFUL OF KITTENS AND I FEEL THE NEED TO CELEBRATE!”
I also started to notice signs that maybe I needed a cat in my life again. Like actual, literal signs.
You would think that all of this would be enough to make me go running to my nearest animal shelter. I mean, Dream George Clooney doesn’t just go handing out kittens on a boat to just anyone, right?
But I’m not really the type of person who’s good at picking up on signs. Even if the signs are named George Clooney or the size of a billboard.Luckily, I am much better at picking up on the sound of really loud kitty cat yowling. Which is exactly what this kitty was doing when I came across her by the side of the road on my walk home on Tuesday.
I was not the first person to find her.
Some college girls had found her right before I did. I was about to explain to them that they could not take the cat BECAUSE GEORGE CLOONEY AND THE BILLBOARD AND SHE IS MINE, SO HANDS OFF MY KITTEN, GIRLS, when one of them told me they couldn’t take her because their roommate was allergic.
I have seriously never been so gleeful about someone’s allergies. I felt kind of bad about that but not that bad BECAUSE KITTEN.
Luckily, they helped me catch the kitten in a shoe box.
I brought her home.
I wrapped her in a towel.
She licked my face about a billion times.
And I called her George.
I’m pretty sure Mr. Clooney would approve.Have you ever had a pet find you?