But I have a pretty good feeling about it.
From what I’ve seen so far, Chinese New Year involves lots of shiny stuff.
And dragons. (2012 being the Year of the Dragon, dontcha know.)
Really, any holiday that has shiny stuff and mythological creatures is all right in my book. (Although, I’d be even more psyched if they replaced all those dragons with unicorns. I mean, come on, now. Unicorns totally deserve their own year. Heck, unicorns deserve their own century. Is there someone I can talk to about this?)For the past couple weeks now, all the stores in my area have been gearing up for the big event by putting out all their special Chinese New Year’s goodies.
There are lots of festive clothes.
And lots of fish-shaped stuff as the fish is a symbol of wealth in Chinese culture.
(Little known fact: fish are very wealthy in China. They always drive the fanciest cars and date hot supermodels. That’s why, if you eat fish in China, you should be careful to check its pockets for spare change before you start eating. Okay, that is totally not true. Everyone knows fish don’t carry spare change. Instead, they hire humans to do that for them. Duh.)
There’s even special lucky, red underwear to wear on the big day.
With all the sparkly stuff and special holiday goodies, it feels a lot like Christmas. (Except I don’t remember wearing special underwear for Christmas. Or did I just miss that day at Catholic school?)And, while all that stuff is pretty cool, the best part about Chinese New Year, in my opinion, is that it’s on January 23rd this year.
This just so happens to be the day before my birthday, which means I get to totally pretend all those fireworks are for me.
Plus, this means I have another two and a half weeks before I have to kick off my New Year’s resolutions. I figure since I’m living in China I should really do like the locals do and observe January 23rd as the official start to my new year. Because I’m all about living like a local… except when it comes to speaking the local language… or eating chicken feet like the locals.my last post, I’m gearing up for some big changes this year. I have decided that 2012 is totally going to be the year I do super challengey stuff – like all the stuff I told myself that I was totally going to do last year.
But this time I really mean it.
This time I even typed up an Excel spreadsheet of all my super challengey resolutions. Because nothing says, “I’m going to make 2012 my bitch” like an Excel spreadsheet.One of my major goals for the year is to get back in shape.
I know I joke a lot about not being able to fit into my pants. But I’m not joking any more, guys. I’ve gained a lot of weight since I left Japan two years ago.
I had to buy a whole bunch of new pants when I went home last year in January after eating my way through Southeast Asia. And now even those pants are starting to get a bit tight since I started eating my way through China.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed my time eating my way through China. Or, at least, just eating my way through lots of pork products. Because, seriously, what’s more fun than eating lots of pork?Unfortunately, I have one of those bodies that doesn’t take too kindly to the reckless shoveling of pork into my face.
My body is the sentimental type – the kind that’s prone to hold on to every little extra calorie.
I suspect it’s saving these calories up for a rainy day — you know, on the off-chance that the rain might deter me from going outside to get more pork. (This has never happened, I’ll have you know. I am just not so easily deterred. My body should know that by now.)
Or it’s possible my body is keeping all those calories on hand for the apocalypse — so as to save me from having to eat cockroaches… or chicken feet. In which case, I really hope those ancient Mayans were on to something. As my hips and thighs are totally prepared for the end of the world.I’ve done a little bit of running and working out since moving to China last year, but I haven’t done nearly enough rigorous exercise to combat all the rigorous dumpling eating I’ve been doing.
I’ve also been trying to eat more healthily since I have my own kitchen now and can make my own meals, but all the salad I’ve been eating hasn’t really made up for all the non-salad items I’ve been eating.
Mind you, I have no lofty ambitions to fit into smaller Chinese-sized pants. That would require major surgery and the possible removal of a few limbs. And I really kind of need my legs, thankyouverymuch.
But my little resolution to get back in shape is going to have wait for a couple weeks.
Because I have some serious eating to do.Tomorrow, I’m catching a flight to Japan, where I plan to eat nonstop for the next week and a half.
I’m going to need to have some of this:
And some of that:
And, yep, these:
And, alright, a few of these:
And, of course, lots of this:
And when I’m not eating, I’ll probably be drinking some of this:
And maybe some of this:
And, possibly, a little bit of this:
Mind you, I do plan to get a little exercise. Because dancing at karaoke totally counts as exercise, right?Then I should be back in China before the Chinese New Year and ready to ring in 2012 with a nice brisk jog around the block and some broccoli.
Okay, and maybe one or two teensy little dumplings. Just in case those Mayans were right about 2012, I would hate for my thighs to be totally unprepared for the end of the world.What are your big, challengey resolutions for the New Year?