The China Challenge: Sally Versus The Middle Kingdom
So, remember last week when I was all like, “I’m in love with China!”
And you were all like, “You’ve only been there a week and a half. You don’t even know China. Give it more time.”
And I was like, “Listen, just because you had that little problem with Bali a couple years ago, doesn’t mean you need to rain on my love-parade. China and I are made for each other!”
And you were like, “Why do you always have to bring up Bali? Really? I made a mistake. It’s not like you’ve never made a mistake. You need to let me heal already!”
Anyway, remember that?
Well, my feelings have changed.
Wait, wait. You can hold your “I told you so”s.
It’s not that I’m not in love with China anymore. We’re just kind of going through a rough patch this week.
Maybe we just moved too fast. Maybe we need to slow things down a bit. Maybe China is just scared of love and is trying to push me away. (Is that it, China? You don’t need to be scared! Hasn’t anyone told you that you deserve love?)
Since China and I are having such a challenging week this week, I’m borrowing today’s blog post theme from the fabulous Megan over at Bangkok Reality Smackdown. (Note, Megan, I said “borrowing” not “stealing.” It’s only stealing if I forget to mention your name and then forget to say nice things about you, right?)
If you haven’t had a chance to check out Megan’s blog, you really should. In her posts, she presents a challenge that she has faced while living as an expat in Bangkok, and then at the end of the post she awards points to herself and whatever she was “smacking down” (as the kids say). Usually her challenges involve potato chips of some kind, so that should be reason enough to read, right? Plus, she’s super hilarious. And she seems like a really, really nice person who wouldn’t mind my stealing… err… borrowing her ideas one bit. (Right, Megan? You’re welcome to borrow my ideas anytime! Want to write a post about your couch, knock yourself out! Don’t have a couch and want to borrow mine? Ummm… let me think about that and get back to you.)
So, here goes, people. I bring you: Sally’s China Reality Smackdown!
Sally vs. Cooties
Not to brag or anything (okay, maybe to brag a little) but my immune system has kicked some major virus butt this past year. Other than a run-in with some bad fish while I was in Luang Prabang and a few reoccurring allergies, I was hardly sick at all while traveling.
In fact, I was so healthy I started to get worried. I mean, who spends two months wading through muddy rice paddies and doesn’t come down with something?
Maybe, I had contracted some kind of super-mud-parasite and my body was slowly morphing into some half-woman, half-undead-muddy-Golem-like-creature.
Or maybe I had been bitten by a radioactive cockroach in my sleep, which had made me impervious to human ailments… and the apocalypse.
Or, quite possibly (and logically), I am a vampire! After all, I do have pasty white skin and find it hard to get out of bed anytime before noon. Sure, I haven’t had a hankering for human blood – but maybe only because blood doesn’t come in cookie-form. (And, if I am a vampire, I’d like to know where my book deal and HBO television series is, already).
Unfortunately, my superhero immune system was no match for the sixty sniffly, cold-ridden college students that I’ve had to come in contact with since starting work. Teaching is great and all, but walking into classroom each day is like walking into a huge, human Petri dish.
On Monday, I woke up with a sore throat. By mid-week, my head was all swirly — either from my illness or from the expired cold medicine I kept popping. (Sure, judge me. But I don’t know where to buy stuff in this country, yet!) Plus, I was all phlegmy and coughing and starting to become concerned. Does black lung still exist and what are the symptoms? What about tuberculosis? Can you get that from chalk dust? Or how about whooping cough? I’m pretty sure I have one of those three diseases… or maybe a combination of all three… or possibly some other disease that hasn’t been heard of since the Eighteenth Century.
Surely, it couldn’t be a common cold making me so miserable. I mean, this is me and my Robocop immune system here! We are impervious! We are not common.
Score:
Sally = 0
Cooties = 945
Vampires = 8 (They would have gotten more, but, frankly, I don’t really understand that whole Twilight thing.)
Sally vs. Work
Remember last week when I was all like, “Wheee, my job is easy!” And you were like, “I want your job!” And I was like, “Tough, you can’t have it! Or maybe you can… but not until after I leave in June.” And you were like, “But, why would I want to work there, if you aren’t there?” And I was like, “Oh, good point.”
Well, I take it all back, people.
My job is hard.
I mean, work is work. First of all, I have to plan all these lessons. Then I have to show up to class… on time… and in pants. And, in order to keep the students’ attention, I have to pretend to be all excited about fragment sentences or proper comma placement. (Okay, admittedly, I’m pretty excited about commas; I mean, come on, who doesn’t love a few well-placed commas? But trying to be excited about these things while battling black lung is, like, not easy, okay.)
Plus, this week my students spent half of the week writing papers, which would have been super awesome if the students didn’t then expect me to actually grade these papers. (What has our educational system come to? Why can’t students just be satisfied with the writing process. I mean, I was pretty satisfied with their writing process – mostly because it allowed me to spend forty-five minutes of class time staring numbly at the ceiling while trying to figure out why the fluorescent light bulbs kept swirling around like that. And were those unicorns up there, too? Yikes, when did the classroom become filled with flying monkeys? Umm… did I just black out?)
It’s now Sunday evening, and I’ve managed to get less than halfway through all of the papers I was hoping to grade this weekend. I’ve tried to be productive; I really have! But being sick and swirly-headed hasn’t made grading easy. (Plus, the flying monkeys got a hold of my red pen and it was just a mess, okay.)
It doesn’t help that almost all the students wrote ten times as much as they should have – I asked them to write a paragraph, and most of them handed in an essay. (Where do they learn that from? Surely, not me! Conciseness is key, kids!)
And, I probably shouldn’t have started drinking red wine somewhere around Paper Number Four yesterday. (I did it for the antioxidants, people! The copious amounts of chicken soup, green tea and Vitamin C drops that I’ve been ingesting for the past week haven’t helped a bit. It’s time to call in the big guns – red wine and chocolate! And, potato chips have antioxidants, too, right?).
Oh, yeah, and, this weekend, I learned I can get Hulu on my computer, which means I spent more time catching up on episodes of 30 Rock and Parks and Recreation than catching up on work. (Hey, I did it for my immune system! Isn’t laughter supposed to be one of those proven immune system boosters? Yeah, I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that one laugh is the equivalent five oranges’ worth of Vitamin C.)
Score:
Sally = 0
Work = 45 (which is the approximate number of essay-length paragraphs I still need to grade)
Red Wine = 16 oz
Liz Lemon = 25 oranges
Sally vs. Snack Food
I can never remember if you should starve a cold and feed a fever or vice versa. Plus, who the heck knows what you do with whooping cough? (Feed it? Starve it? Take it out for a nice dinner? Or is a whooping cough more of a potluck party kind of thing?)
Anyway, since I’ve been feeling pretty yucky, I haven’t been up to eating much. In fact, I haven’t eaten a single cookie all week. That’s seven days of no cookies! It’s like I don’t even know who I am anymore.
Instead, I bought lettuce this week.
And ate it.
Whoa.
This evening I went out to find dinner, and came back with a snack-size bag of potato chips, bananas and a bottle of Vitamin Water. Really, people, it’s like I’m on a diet, here — I mean, a snack size bag? What? Have I become a bird or something?
Nothing good can come from this. Okay, so it would be nice to lose some weight, but what if I lose too much weight and then my pants become too loose. I’m too swirly-headed to catch them if they suddenly fall! Then, I’ll be walking around pants-less in China. Great… just great. As if China wasn’t scared of loving me already!
Score:
Sally = 0
Snack food = 0 (those snack sized bags don’t count)
My pants = in need of a belt
Sally vs. the Chinese Language
Luckily, it hasn’t all been a huge loss for me this week. I did learn some Chinese!
Okay, don’t get too excited. I didn’t learn any actual words or anything.
My students taught me the hand signals used for the numbers one to ten. You can use these signals, like sign language, with vendors and people in restaurants to figure out how much things cost — that is, as long as everything costs under ten RMB, which is about one dollar and fifty cents. (Luckily, my tastes run pretty cheap.)
When I ate at one of the street stalls this weekend, I didn’t have to throw a whole wad of money at the woman in order to pay. Instead, she signaled how much I owed her, and I handed it over. How civilized of me!
Now, I just need to find out the hand symbols used for “Where’s the restroom?” and “Who wants to buy me a drink?” and I’ll be all ready for my new life in China!
Score:
Sally = 10
The Chinese Language = 10
Whoever wants to buy me a drink = 500
Sally vs. Her Couch
Wait, why am I fighting my couch? I love my couch.
Obviously, I’ve become too sick and swirly and disoriented to make any sense anymore. (I was making sense before, right? Right?! Great. The monkeys are back again. Dangit.)
On that note, I’ll leave you with my final score and a promise that next week I’ll hopefully be back to having my own blog post ideas. (Thanks for letting me “borrow” yours, Megan! Seriously, I owe you some potato chips. But I think it’s illegal to send potato chips from China to Thailand, so how about if I just eat a lot of potato chips once I feel better and tell you about them? Fair?)
Final Score:
China = 428
Sally = 251
Love = Conquers all. As do unicorns. (You can see the unicorns, right? Why is the ceiling swirling around like that?)
I’m sure it’s just your lack of Venus getting in the way. You and China will work out fine– give it some time. True love waits! Maybe you guys need Promise rings or something.
MaryAnne recently posted..Notes on Genocidal Tourism in Cambodia
I was thinking we at least need matching t-shirts or something!
Your China love affair sounds like a high school romance. Hopefully next week you will won’t hate each other and never want to talk to one another ever again. I am sure you will work it out though.
Also: wine has LOTS of antioxidants. I should know I drink it regularly and always feel anti-oxidized.
Kenan Lucas recently posted..Crashing Motorcycles On Langkawi
High school romance? Yeah, I didn’t have many of those (read: any). But China and I are so much more mature than that… I think.
Too funny, Sally! (Although, is that mean of me to be laughing out loud at your misfortune?) Hope you’re feeling better soon and that you and China make up.
By the way, that Bali incident? You were totally talking about me, right? In the end, Bali and I just needed some time apart. I think we’re on amicable terms now, and even have fond memories of some our low points. (There’s a blog post in there, whenever I get around to writing it.)
Ha ha! Actually after writing that, I was like “Bali? Who could have had a problem with Bali? I should have used another country.” But, alas, I MUST have meant the two of you! I hope you & Bali have managed to work things out.
Aaaw, I’m sure like you said your relationship with China is just hitting a rough patch. Very common with new love once the honeymoon is phase is over. Don’t worry.. it’ll get better. Maybe China found out that you’re not in it 100%? I mean, you are leaving in June :p Does China know about this?
jill- Jack and JIll Travel recently posted..Why I’ll Never Climb Mt Whitney In One Day Again
Uhh… I was totally going to let China know, but, you know, I didn’t want to get rid of all of the mystery!
The first two weeks are always a mess of emotions. Just give it time and eat more pringles.
They need to come out with some Vitamin C Pringles. That would totally kick this cold’s butt!
At least you are in a relationship with China. Syria rejected my advances yesterday just because I negleted the foreplay of getting a visa in advance. Luckily, Jordan is less discerning and took me back.
Shane recently posted..The Twitter 10- March 2011
You know, I’ve heard that about Syria. Such a tease, that one!
Love can be a rocky path. At least you’ll always have your couch
Laurence recently posted..Travel- my selfish pursuit
Yes, the couch will never leave me. Or at least it better not!
I’m surprised you haven’t tried any Chinese Folk medicine cures [actually, I guess "traditional medicine" is a nicer sounding term]…some of them should be familiar from your time in Thailand.
For example, Tiger Balm [a universal medicine?]…maybe rub some on your chest or a bit under the nose for better breathing?
Tea? I was going to recommend regular green tea [just larger amounts], but there must be a tea just for colds.
Ginger! Eat larger (?) amounts of ginger! Maybe put some ginger in chicken soup? Chicken soup is always soothing.
Otherwise, I’d recommend stretching out on that couch, and catching up on your reading, or Hulu. Like Diana Ross sang, “love don’t come easy.” Hang in there.
The clinic just hooked me up with some meds today. I now have antibiotics (bor-ing but hopefully effective) and some little packets of weird little brown balls that I need to swallow (gross-tasting, but feel totally old school Chinese). Good times!
And, yeah, still plenty of tea & chicken soup going on over here. And I had a ginger bubble tea the other day, so that counts, right?
You are too much. This was really entertaining.
Instead of burdening yourself with all of that grading, do this:
1. Don’t actually read them
2. Put smiley faces in the margins.
3. Put one sad face somewhere just to keep it real.
4. Give everyone high (but not too high) marks – this will boost their self-confidence and give you a reservoir of goodwill to work with.
As for your other problems, I have no answers, although it seems like you’re not doing too bad except for the cooties, which yeah, that really sucks.
B well,
Phil
Phil recently posted..Cote D’Ivoire Needs One Minute of Your Time
How about a few questionable faces — you know the ones with the squiggly lines for mouths. That will keep the students wondering!
yeah and then every now and then draw a face vomiting. Can you pull that off?
Phil recently posted..Quick Update on Cote D’Ivoire
Most definitely. Can they vomit sparkles?
I wouldn’t expect anything less
Phil recently posted..Quick Update on Cote D’Ivoire
When I had to grade papers I just put a bunch of check marks all over the place. The more wine I had to help get me through grading, the larger the check marks!
It’s REALLY awkward if you spill red wine on a paper, though, because students can always tell what it is and think their teacher is a total slush. Which may or may not be true, but they certainly don’t need to know that.
Awesomely entertaining post, by the way! It had me in stitches.
Christy @ Technosyncratic recently posted..Photos of the Week- Bourbon Street
Yeah, that would be awk-ward. I’ll remember to keep my red wine holding hand separate from my red pen holding hand!
Awww, coming down with something can really bum you out. Especially straight away in a new place. But you really do seem to be coping. Oh, and I’m pretty sure red wine can miraculously cure you of Plague … or whatever it is you seem to be infected with.
Ceri recently posted..Saying ‘Yes’
Bad news: I’m now on antibiotics which means no wine. How does THAT even make any sense?
I’m suing!
Totally kidding, considering I stole…err….borrowed the idea from somebody my own self. I mean…I’m suing! I expect payment in cool cucumber potato chips!
So…there are hand symbols in Chinese to indicate 1-10 that aren’t just, you know, 1-10? Huh. It really *is* a different country.
I think you should give yourself more credit for smacking it down over there, lady.
Megan recently posted..WTF What THE! Friday Part 19
Well, the symbols for 1-5 are pretty much the same as every country’s; it’s numbers 6-10 that get tricky. I can’t remember them all but I know that number 8 looks like a gun (hey, I’m American! We’re supposed to remember stuff like that!)
And I would totally send you those cucumber chips but I doubt they’d make it in the mail… okay, they don’t really have to worry about the mail — they have to worry about me! They’d probably never make it in the box!
The sign for 6 is like the old surfer Hawaii Hang Loose thing with thumb and pink extended and other fingers curled under. It’s my favourite!
MaryAnne recently posted..Travelling Yourself Into a Corner- On Impulse Control and Unplanned Stability
Pinky! Not pink. Pinky!
MaryAnne recently posted..Travelling Yourself Into a Corner- On Impulse Control and Unplanned Stability
Oh yeah, I like that one, too. The bubble tea gave me that symbol the other day & it made me very happy.
There is nothing like illness — minor, undramatic, tedious illness, as opposed to something one could brag about — to give oneself a bit of a hangover after a love in with a new country.
Hope you feel better. And, god, the more I read about your adventures in Mandarin (or otherwise), the more scared I am of attempting it…
Theodora recently posted..Learning to Love Our Motorbike
Yes, and I went to the clinic today & found out that I’m not dying… or destined to suffer endlessly and dramatically. Dangit. Nothing to brag about at all!
Miss Sally, how to heal your ailment? My suggestion is learning Mandarin! Free of charge! Because it bring you a lot of fun and interesting . For instance, when the Chinese word “East” + “West” together= things.When the word “girl” + “boy” together= good. The word “padi field”+ “energy” together =man. and so on_ _ _ _.Ha.Ha.
Wow, Mandarin does sound very interesting. But I’ll have to wait until my brain starts functioning again, I think.
Wow, your disease sounds like the one I had in Beijing. Remember, the one that forced me to bail out of China and run back to Thailand as fast as the plane could carry me? Man, that sucked. I still shudder when I remember it.
Feel better soon!
Oh, I was actually thinking I could use a little Southeast Asian vacation right about now!
Well, you definitely have me NOT looking forward to exploring with my weak ass ninny immune system.
Living with kids (not mine) already brings the plague around every so often.
My suggestion would be to go and buy some dice and then roll to see what grades your students get. That way you can still do it while watching 30 rock AND you can make it into a game! Take a swig of wine when you roll 7s!
Erica recently posted..Travel and the Wonderful World of Tattoos
Just stay away from any children, adolescents or sniffly twenty-year-olds while you’re traveling! I had no problems at all until I came into contact with all these young germ-covered college students!
Whenever I think of unicorns now, I think of you. I don’t know how it’s come up, but Adam, Nicole, and I have talked about unicorns several times and seen your China posts pop up in our feeds. If the antioxidants in the wine don’t work (and it seems they haven’t), know we’re thinking of you and eating junk food and tasty cakes on your behalf (okay, so that may not help, but the sympathy eating we’re doing is certainly fun..til our pants don’t fit).
Take care of yourself <3
Heather recently posted..Tasmania and Nature
“Whenever I think of unicorns now, I think of you.” That’s maybe the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me!
Sally, I just laughed my way through this entire post. I just wanted you to know that!
And in China I found that almost everyone understands “toilet.”
Good luck on that Chinese…in two months I only learned to speak about 20 words and read 3!
Finally, feel better!!!
Aaron @ Aaron’s Worldwide Adventures recently posted..Say What Travel Photo- Numb Biscuits!
20 words? That sounds like a LOT. I really doubt I’ll be able to learn that many in my time here!
LOL! Well, 5 of them were numbers (yes, I could only count to 5…) And you’ll learn your nationality pretty quickly…everyone always wants to know that one!
Aaron @ Aaron’s Worldwide Adventures recently posted..“Be Safe…You Might Get Bombed”
While I know my mother taught me that it’s not nice to laugh at the misfortune of others, I couldn’t help but chuckle a few times while reading this post. But you manage to make even having a cold hilarious!
I’m sorry to hear that you and China are going through a bit of a rough patch. Maybe you should offer to share some of your wine and potato chips with it. Perhaps it’s just jealous?
Amanda recently posted..Paying My Respects at the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific
China can get its own wine and potato chips! Jerky China. Wait… I take it back! I love you, China, I really do. Just this cold you gave me is making me cranky. (Plus with the antibiotics I’m on I can’t drink. Dangit).
We drop ship chocolate
Will trade for interesting fruit or vegetable seeds. Flying monkeys sound serious. But grading 45 essays sounds considerably worse. I always had A’s in English but I preferred teaching questions like, “The number is ___.” Maybe you could trade one Mandarin word per essay. Are the hand gestures based on Kanji? 1100 words would provide a basic vocabulary but that’s a lot of flying monkeys, woot.
I don’t understand the Twilight thing either. Or the vampire craze in general. That really sucks that you’re sick, I hope the meds make you feel better quickly!
Ali recently posted..Evolution of Luggage
Yeah, I read the first book & just got really annoyed with it. I mean, maybe I’m missing something here, but, uh, why would you want to be in a relationship with some guy WHO WANTS TO DRINK YOUR BLOOD? Uh, yeh. That stuff isn’t healthy.
This was one of my *favourite* unbrave posts. I especially liked the way you scored things. I think you should use a similar method when grading students’ papers. OR instead of scoring their papers, just put unicorn stickers on the top and write “Good job!” I know they’re in college, but who doesn’t feel better after unicorns and praise?
Odysseus recently posted..ROUS in India
Actually, I think my students would totally dig that. Apparently, they were super psyched to get out of classes for the past two days that I’ve been home sick. So adding unicorn stickers would just be the cherry on top of their awesome week!
ROFLMAO,..!! ur body was slowly morphing into some half-woman, half-undead-muddy-Golem-like-creature.. Oh u crack me up. But yeah, it’s really a thing to be proud of once you acquire the Asian immune system.. very commendable indeed:P Oh and it’s feed the cold and starve the fever;) .. but what happens when you got both eh? Superb post.. love love love!
ciki recently posted..The Deli- Micasa
Well, unfortunately, my newly acquired Asian immune system was no match for black lung. But I bet after I leave China (if I make it out alive!), I’ll be like Super Woman.
P.S. Happy to see your comment finally came through. Yay!
Hahahaha, what a great post! I had this experience once, and I kept telling myself, no I really do love it, because I really wanted to… but then realized I didn’t love it, it was just lust. Lust is a tricky beast that we all have to deal with Sally. Here’s hoping your lust can return to love.
Well, I can definitely tell you I’m not in lust with China anymore! After all, I’m not exactly feeling too sexy with all the phlegm my body has been producing. TMI?
Hi Sally,
I just discovered your blog, and you’ve jsut moved to China! I just moved out of China (might move back) but I spent a year and a half teaching university in Huzhou, Zhejiang. And like you say, it’s easy, but it’s hard!
As for the immune system, almost everyone I know has gotten some degree of sick within the first two weeks they arrive in China. My advice is to get some hand sanitizer and keep it with you at all times because there is hardly ever soap. Not that that will help you now, sadly, but for the future.
Good luck! And I’m really looking forward to reading about your China adventures!
Ellis,
Glad you stopped by! Well, I guess I’m glad to hear the plague is a common thing, even if I feel like a total freak right now. Hopefully, once my immune system finally recovers it will be back to kicking viral butt!
Sad to hear you’re not SO in love with China, but happy you’re still enjoying it! I’m moving there in April (probably) so it’s nice to get an insiders view!
Amy recently posted..6 Online Ways To Keep Safe Abroad
Well, hopefully, China won’t make you sick like it did me! But, luckily, I’m on the mend & learning to love again!
Love takes times…to heal…- I’m so quoting Mariah Scarey here…do hope you and Big C work out your differences…I’m sad to announce that you don’t suffer from any of those 3 illnesses (I’m a doctor, I should know), but if it makes you feel better, I’ll throw in a flu…what do you say? the perfect illness to do nothing but lying on a couch, munching on chips and watching TV (anything but vampires – I don’t get the whole Twilight thing either)…Oh, and you MUST learn the signal for “Where is the nearest karaoke bar?” – that’s just begging for a story! I know you won’t disappoint
Well, if you say I should be hanging out on my couch, eating chips & watching TV, I will take your word for it. You ARE a doctor, and all! And I’ll get right on that karaoke thing.
I love your writing, it’s so fun to read. I feel like I’m reading an e-mail from a friend, or more accurately listing to a rambling phone call. It makes for a fun day and I hope you update soon.
Victoriana recently posted..Alla- Dollface- Rodgier van der Weyden- and Cats
So glad you enjoyed it! I try to update my blog once a week — but, unfortunately, I’m already behind for last week. I’m blaming it on China! (Sorry, China, someone has to take the fall!)
Oh! Hi-larious! You poor thing you…though being swirly headed, semi hallunciatory sick in a very strange land can be kind of fun sometimes, in a strange this-will-make-a-good-story / how-adventurous-am-I / the-world-really-is-a-strange-and-wondrous-place kind of way. Plus, there’s the unicorns.
I do hope you and China work things out, although I have a feeling things may get worse. I follow an expat blogger in China, and due to nervousness about various uprisings and what have you about the world, she’s just pretty much lost all access to the interwebs. Now that would be a deal breaker for me!
ejorpin recently posted..Weeping on a jet plane
Luckily (through the wonders of computer science), I’ve managed to stay pretty well-connected. There were a few days there when I was without Facebook & Twitter, but all is sorted… for now. I really don’t think I’d be too happy if I didn’t have access to my social networking sites!
“Now, I just need to find out the hand symbols used for ‘Where’s the restroom?’ ”
Isnt that the Pee-Pee dance? I thought that translated into EVERY language?
Brilliant post as always! damn you and your funny, hallucinogenic ways!
-Rick
Rick Jones recently posted..Tales from Bangkok – Arriving in Bangkok and taxi ride
Sure brings back some memories. You’ll get over some of those negative feelings and return to an indifferent feeling of your city. China will definitely challenge even the strongest immune system. I suggest baijiu–it’ll kill whatever is ailing you, including you.
ChinaMatt recently posted..Overlooking the Palace
Oh I’m sorry, as some one else said, its not right to laugh at some one else’s misfortune but LOL that was FUNNY!
But please tell me HOW do you get to see unicorns? That must be a special love gift from China? Whenever I am in the depths of the dreaded lurgy all I see is that light at the end of the tunnel – you know the one they say “Don’t fly towards the light!”
I can’t reveal the secrets of the unicorn… but seeing them usually involves lots of cold medicine. Preferably out-of-date cold medicine.
That could be the problem
not that I am beyond taking expired meds being well aware of the redundancy built into the system but I rarely resort to meds to cure the dreaded lurgy. Coca cola (TM!) to combat the dehydration, curl up in bed, moan quietly a lot (OK OK not so quietly) and liberal coatings of Vicks or Tiger balm to clear the nasal passages.